Bhaiya ye dres vaapis kar lijiye jo kal le gayee thee

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ek vyakti apanee beemaar daadee ko muhalle ke doktar ke paas dikhaane le gaya… doktar : munh kholo daadee… daadee : tumhaaree beevee roz shaam ko tumhaare kampaundar ke saath ghoomatee hai… bas, isase jyaada mera munh mat khulavaana. jyotish:- tumhaaree hastarekha kahatee hai ki tumhaaren ghar ke neeche bahut dhan hai kintu ye tumhaaren kisee upayog ya kaam nahin aayega. kalloo:- bilakul saheen kaha panditajee. mere phlait ke theek neeche baink hain! ladakee:- bhaiya ye dres vaapis kar lijiye.. jo kal le gayee thee dukaanadaar:- kya hua bahan. kalar pasand nahin aaya ya print ? ladakee:- vo baat ye hain ki ise pahanakar fesabuk aur vhotsaip stetas pe foto daalee thee.. ek bhee laik nahin aaya! profesar :- haath kangan ko aarasee kya’ ka matalab samajhaen pappoo :- jo mahilaen haath mein kangan pahan kar gaadee chalaatee hain, pulis unase aar see nahin maangatee hai prophesar saahab ne saaree kitaabon ko aag laga dee.

sharma jee maanasik rog visheshagy ke paas pahunche daaktar – “kya samasya hai” “hamaaree koee samasya nahin.” ham baadashaah akabar hain, baadashaah ko koee samasya bhala ho sakatee hai. samasya to hamaaree begam jodhaabaee kee hai. “unakee kya samasya hai?” “vo samajhatee hai ki vo misej sharma hai

ek dost – aur kya chal raha ha laiph mein doosara dost -ghashadhdabrahshavajvababd . pahala dost – kuchh samajh nahin aa raha? doosara dost – haan bas yahee chal raha hai

beefed – mere puraane kapade donet karoon kya ? pati – phenk de, kya donet karana.. beevee – nahin jee, duniya mein bahut-see gareeb, bhookhee-pyaasee aurate hai, bichaaree koee bhee pahan legee… pati – tere naap ke kapade jisako aa jaaye, vo bhookhee-pyaasee thodee na hogee… ab pati ghar se pharaar hai

girl :- bhaieeya 100 roope ka petrol daal do. petrol vaala :- daal diya maim. girl :- kitane roope hue ? petrol vaala :- do sau hue, lekin aap dedh sau de do

1583/5000

A man took his ailing grandmother to see the local doctor.
Doctor: Open your mouth Grandma…
Grandma: Your wife roams around with your compounder every evening…
Just don't open my mouth more than this.

Astrology: Your palm says that
You have a lot of money under the house
But it will not be of any use or use to you.
Kallu: - Panditji is rightly said.
There are banks just below my flat!





Girl: - Brother, please return this dress .. which was taken yesterday
Shopkeeper: - What happened sister. Did not like the color or print?
Girl: - It is a matter of wearing it
Photo was uploaded on Facebook and Whatsapp status ..
Not a single one came!

Professor: - Explain what the hand bracelet means to RC
Pappu: - Women who drive by wearing bracelets in their hands,
The police do not ask them for RC
Professor sir set all the books on fire.

Sharma reached to the psychiatrist
Doctor - "What's the problem"
"We have no problem." We are Emperor Akbar, the emperor may have a problem. The problem is of our begum Jodha Bai.
"What's their problem?"
"She thinks she is Mrs. Sharma



A friend - what else is going on in life
The second friend - Ghashaddrabhashvajvabbad.
First friend - not understanding anything?
Second friend - yes this is going on.


Wife - What do I donate my old clothes?
Husband - throw away, what to donate ..
Wife - No, there are many poor, hungry and thirsty women in the world, anyone will wear a bachari…
Husband - Whoever comes to your clothes, will not be hungry or thirsty… Now the husband is absconding from home.

Girl: - Brother, pour 100 rupees of petrol.
Petrolman: - Put ma'am.
Girl: - How many rupees?
Petrolman: - Two hundred, but you give one hundred and fifty!